Tuesday, March 30, 2004
Tight Bite
First of all, let me just say that I was singing the song "Hey Ya" in my head a moment ago and decided I should turn on the radio....and that was what was playing when I turned it on. Weird.

Anyway, I am alive despite not posting for two days. Frankly, I just didn't have much to say, and didn't want to force myself to write some boring drivel to post just for the sake of posting. Don't post unless you feel moved to, people!
Actually, I don't have that much more to say now either, I'm just in a good mood. Could it be because I'm getting my new car today??? (*tail wag*) Things are already running amok as I forgot some of the paperwork I need back at my house, making it difficult to finalize the arrangements with my insurance company and the dealership (oops! you need a blank cheque? d'oh!). Whatever, I'll do anything to get this done today....I want the car OH so badly!! Mmmm..shiny...blue..
Maybe I'll drive home at lunch and get the stuff I need (a pain in the ass of the most gigantic proportions...an hour, round trip in the pouring rain).

Yesterday I went to the dentist to get some fillings. If only you folks could sit in on a session at the dentist with me...it's a joy ride. For instance, at one point, I launched into such a huge giggling fit that the dentist had to stop drilling because I was jiggling my gaping mouth too much. A short time later I was threatening to murder him (yes, I actually reached for his throat) as he was yanking out a wedge he had stuck in between my teeth to separate them (it got a little glued in there and hurt like a sonofabitch when he pulled it out). I slapped his hand away and told him I didn't love him anymore. When it was all over we were friends again, though I did NOT enjoy the frozen mouth sensation for the many hours that followed. I even tried a nap, but still woke up frozen. Now I just gotta get used to the feeling in my mouth..things feel a little funny in there.

This morning I have finally caught up on all my blog reading; I was way, way behind. Not much to report in the news these days, which I take as an extremely good sign. But let it be known that Madonna has decided to grace Israel with her presence this fall and will will be putting on two concerts in Tel Aviv. Like her or hate her, I'm just happy such a big-name star is putting on a show there. It says a lot, including the fact that it's a safe place to go and perform. Good for her, Israel needs this kind of boost. Guess her strange love affair with the Kabbalah has really paid off.

Other than that, not much else to report. Last night I met up with a nice guy; he's been in Canada for three years...moved here from Iran. Yes, a Jew and an Iranian hanging out! Imagine that.. and I think we'll be great friends. We played some pool, ate some food, and he let me ask him a thousand questions about his life, his family and his homeland. *Very* interesting!

And now..I am trying to make myself a cd with some happy music to play in my new car. I need some suggestions for happy songs (like Hey Ya!) to welcome my new car. :-D What songs make you want to get up and dance or sing outloud?

(also, I just answered the phone here at work and when the person on the phone asked for a guy I work with I said "one sex, please" instead of "one sec(ond), please" when I put him on hold. Smooth move!)

Saturday, March 27, 2004
first ya zig, than ya zag
Ladies and gentlemen....I am getting a new car next week!!! Talk about coming out of the blue or what?? Yes, my boss had done some math and decided to upgrade me from my current car (a 2001 Kia Sephia, black) to a shiny new 2004 Honda Civic DX. Apparently it carries the same monthly as my little Kia (there's a promotion on at the moment), so someone else in the office is getting my Kia and I get the new car. Hurray!!! I just came back from the dealership where I picked out the pretty blue as my colour of choice (hardly a surprise given my love affair with the colour blue). Actually, this particular blue is called "eternal blue"; not quite as catchy as celestial blue, but it'll do. *wink* I am so excited I could pee. The blue is so gorgeous!!! (I will take a picture of the car when I get it, because this picture here does it no justice)

This helps balance things out a bit..coz earlier in the week I found out that Princess Blondie, my beloved friend and neighbour across the hall from me, will be moving out in July; she and her beau Bruno have bought a home. I didn't mention it until now because quite frankly I'm quite glum at the prospect of living in this building without them; they have truly made it a joy here. *sigh* But on the other hand I am very happy for them, and their excitement is contagious. They aren't moving impossibly far away, so I will still see them. I just know that friendships can drift with even the slightest of distances, but we have made a pact to not let that happen. I will drive up to her house every Thursday if I have to, to catch Survivor! :-D
So let this be my big congratulations to them.....they truly deserve it.

Now I think I'm gonna catch up on a few chores around the home that have been neglected for the last two weeks. Dishes, and some tidying. And I have to put some clothes away....I went and did a little shopping with my mom this morning and got myself some new jeans. I am in love with the Gap stretch jeans and will wear no other; I finally had to get a new pair because I wore the ass clean out of my old ones on Friday giving anyone who was interested a little peep of flesh. If that's not a sign to get new jeans, I don't know what is. And I got a whole bunch of bright and colourful t-shirts from Old Navy to help keep my mood cheery as spring starts to roll in (*fingers crossed*). Nothing like a little shopping (you know, a new car, a pair of jeans and some t-shirts) to really improve one's mood. I think I've spent my first day off in weeks rather well!

Friday, March 26, 2004
THANK GOD IT'S FRIDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I haven't had a day off in nearly two weeks and I'm ready to collapse. After work tonight I intend to come home, have a nice hot bath, curl up with a movie and just RELAX (and try my best not to fall asleep). The last two days I have worked both jobs and by the time I got home at night I was practically crawling to bed. And my (main) job has had me out of the office and away from any computers, so I haven't had a chance to update. In fact, when I sat down at my keyboard this morning it actually felt weird and foreign to my fingertips. Have I been away from my computer that much that it doesn't feel familiar!?! gahhhh!!

Just a few quick things before I head to work......
More hate crimes in the Toronto area...only this time it was the Muslims being targeted!! After painting "Jesus Rules" on a mosque it was set on fire. Yeah, nice job idiots, I'm sure Jesus would be very proud of you.

And Turkey has had an earthquake killing at least 9 people. This is the third? fourth? earthquake in the middle east in the last 6 months? Yikes....things are really startin' to shake, rattle and roll over there. Makes me nervous...
My condolences to the families.

And now I'm really late for work.....so everyone have a good weekend, and be good!! And be sure to check out my photoblog if you haven't already (<-- shameless self promotion). And K-Dogg's photoblog (<-- lovingly promoting a friend).

Wednesday, March 24, 2004
don't EVEN get me started on this....
If this is their idea of getting back at Israel, Hamas is pretty sick.

A 12 year old (or 14 depending on reports) boy was paid 100 Shekels to blow himself up at a border, 'hopefully' taking as many Israeli soldiers along with him as possible. A robot was sent in to take the belt off the boy and he was taken in for questioning.
Let me help you, my audience, grasp this. The child was paid (not that he could use the money if he was dead) what is the equivalence to about $22 US dollars. Basically, in the eyes of Hamas, $22 is worth one Palestinian child and how ever many Jews he can take down with him.

Of course, they tried something similar last week when they gave an 11 year old boy a bomb to take across the border. Yeah that's right, and ISRAEL is the monster in all this..... don't make me laugh.
And I'd like to point out that THIS kind of stuff never makes it to CNN.com.

when it rains, it pours..
I am REALLY starting to get angry...

There have been two more incidents of anti-semitic vandalism in the Toronto area.
Mercifully they managed to arrest one of the bastards.

Tuesday, March 23, 2004
Well, I didn't have time to write a real post today because I spent the day working on my new photoblog "Captured Dreams". There's a lot of pics to sift through, so maybe you wanna try browsing the categories in the left column or click here for pics from Canada or here for pics from my trip to Israel. Check it out and let me know what you think.

I'd like to give a hat tip to K-Dogg, because I stole the idea from him and yet he STILL was nice enough to lend me a hand. If you haven't checked out his photoblog yet, click here. His pictures are absolutely fantastic.

Oh yeah, and I just got back from seeing Dawn of the Dead. Again. What are you guys waiting for??? Go see it, already!

Monday, March 22, 2004
here comes the rain again...
The world was a busy place while I slept last night. It often makes me fearful to check the news when I get up in the morning. This morning I stood with tears welling in my eyes as I watched news footage of yet more anti-semitic vandalism in the Toronto area, MY backyard, and just down the street from me. Exactly a week ago from the last incident, I watched the news as it showed tombstones tipped over, swastikas painted on Israeli signs and windows smashed in at local synagogues. I would be lying if I didn't say it worried me... I am angry and scared as I see places *I* know in the footage. I know those streets, I walk them. And I feel violated. Go look at the footage in the link and tell me you don't feel rage too. I have a sticker in the window of my home of two flags, the flag of Israel and the flag of Canada, to show solidarity. Does this mean my home will be targeted next? Just try it, you nasty sonsabitches!

The problem with living in Canada (as opposed to Israel) is that incidents like these are perceived as "the Jew's problems" not anyone else's. In Israel, Jews ARE the majority, so it is everyone's problem when something like this occurs. What is it going to take to make it everyone's problem here in Canada? How is hate not a community problem? Is it going to have to be made personal for it to matter? Will it take ME getting killed or hurt before my non-Jewish friends stand up and speak out?
And you know what? There are times I'd almost feel safer in Israel...there at least there is a sense of security, of awareness. They have guards outside of cafes, for pete's sake! Meanwhile I walk into a building that is clearly marked Canadian Zionist Federation for my Hebrew class, and note how easy it would be to attack. Anyone could walk into the building and blow it up or shoot up the place if they suddenly had a hankering for Jewish blood.
I live in Canada, where we believe we are safe from all that bad stuff, and if it happens, it's believed to be a one time incident that happens to other people. Well you know what? It's happening to MY people, and MY neighbourhood, and it's not going to go away if you just turn your head. And I am pissed right off.

Meanwhile, Israel has been taking care of business and killed Sheikh Ahmed Yassin, the founding leader of Hamas today. I might remind you that Hamas is a TERRORIST oraganization, responsible for a large portion of the bombings in Israel. And while half the world is off condemning Israel for targeted killings, I'd pose the question.....if the US Army had Osama bin Laden in their sights while flying overhead, and had a chance to finally take down the man responsible for so many deaths of it's citizens... do you think the world would condemn them if they chose to assassinate him? Why are the standards different for Israel than everyone else? The Palestinians have flat out refused to crack down on the terrorist activity, and so Israel is left with no other choice than to do it themselves.

However, my concerns now heighten for Israel..... this action is akin to smacking a hornets nest with a stick. The Palestinians are vowing revenge, but really, they are always trying to sneak into Israel. Each and every day terrorist attacks are thwarted, we just don't always hear about them. So don't think that they had stopped trying and NOW they're gonna start trying again....they never stopped in the first place. Threats are what they do best, so now the Palestinians are trying to scare Israeli citizens. But again, I'd be lying if I didn't say I was worried. Anger fans the flames, and you can bet your sweet ass that the Palestinians will be stepping up their efforts. And it will easier than ever to recruit volunteers to do the dirty deeds (they have already begun to line up. link via Michele. In fact, go read her post on all this, she says it MUCH better than I do).
For a better understanding of targeted killings and why Israel does it, read this (via JD).

Indeed, a great start to my week. :-/

Sunday, March 21, 2004
psssssst.......*this* way.....
Most of my life I have drifted along, without much of a clue about anything. I'll admit it. But in the last 6 years or so, I started to get a feeling once in a while that occasionally made me question the direction in which I was currently going. Sometimes I would get a nagging feeling that I should be going in a different direction...trying something new, or seizing an opportunity. Or sometimes I would get a feeling like I was going in the entirely wrong direction in my life, and get the haunting notion that I'm not following the path I was intended. Have you ever had this?

You might recall I had this feeling earlier in the year....it often comes with angst I am experiencing in my life when it comes to my job. In January I had decided that the powers that be wanted me to try my hand at a few new things. So I got myself a second job and cleaned up my eating habits; I made some good changes and have felt great for the effort.
However, if it's one thing I've learned, it's that this mysterious nagging isn't always so obvious about what I should be doing. Just because I got the feeling that I should take another job, doesn't mean the opportunity lies within the job itself, for instance. Maybe it's setting me up to meet someone who could influence my life in a different direction. Truly it's frustrating trying to listen to this little inner voice of mine, because it friggin' well mumbles when it speaks; I can't always tell what I'm supposed to do or what the point is of an action I feel like I'm supposed to take.

Anyway, that nagging voice quieted when I took the second job at the scuba shop, and I went back to tripping merrily along in life. However, I'm getting the feeling again. Usually the feeling is pretty black and white; it gives me the impression that I'm either to head in a specific direction, or to just stop the direction I'm going in, and maybe even turn around. This time, however, it's feeling different. It feels like....I dunno.....like I maybe didn't take a choice far enough...or I'm on the right path...BUT.......but something. I don't know. It's like.. "yes, you're going in the right direction and the things you are doing now are part of it...but you're still not doing this".
It's driving me batty. I think I know what the last piece of the puzzle is, but it's so logistically out of the question that there is no way it's going to happen. It's a big move, and I am just not willing to take such a huge chance. I'm not. Not right now, anyway. So what am I supposed to do? What do you do when you feel like you should do something that seems impossible? And I'm not talking something that's really hard, but definitely attainable (like shedding a lot of weight, or learning a new language), I'm talking about something that could have devastating effects if you fail.

Ok, I'm just talking in circles now, so I'm gonna drop it. All's I'm saying is that I feel like I'm not quite done with something in my life that I was hoping I was. There is more to my drive to go back to visit Israel than I am willing to consider. That's all.


Sorry I disappeared for a couple of days, but things have been a bit busy, and I really just didn't have much to say. I didn't think I needed to bore you with details about hanging out with my brother Friday afternoon, for instance. And yesterday I worked....I'm betting you don't need to hear the boring details of another day in retail hell. lol. Actually, it wasn't so bad, I work with a great girl who helped the day go by fast. I'm feeling a bit at odds with this job, but I'll post more on that another time.

However, last night I went and saw an awesome movie.....Dawn of the Dead! It's a remake of the old classic zombie movie, and it was excellent!!!! Scary, funny, creepy....all that good stuff (and it was filmed in Toronto, to boot!). Great cast, and really well put together (and great site, you should check it out). If it's one thing I've learned from this movie and the last zombie movie that scared the hell out of me (28 Days Later), it's that the idea of world chaos and a massive outbreak of a disease (or some other such catalyst) scares me pretty much more than anything. And this was the thing that scared me about Dawn of the Dead; it wasn't the zombies running around (ok, maybe a bit, they were really scary!) it was the psychological aspect that terrified me. What would *I* do in that situation? It's every man for himself, and in many cases your family has been wiped out, you are on the run trying to survive, and everyone is your enemy. Gahhh!! I can't imagine! I think I would totally curl up into a ball on the floor and whimper.
So yeah, if you wanna see a totally scary movie with fast running zombies, be sure to check it out. I think I might even go see it again, it was that good. But for now.....I'm gonna go get ready for another day of work. *yAWn*

Thursday, March 18, 2004
brain squeeze
So yesterday wasn't my best day, in the end. I had to work both jobs, making it a really long day, and for whatever reason The TV Network Gods decided to move Survivor to Wednesday night instead of Thursday night this week (of course they'd have to move it to the one night I'm working this week). My beloved neighbour across the hall from me, Princess Blondie, agreed to watch the show with me when I got home from work (since we always watch it together on Thursday nights). So I set my vcr to tape it for later. Long story short, I set the vcr for the wrong day, and neither of us got to watch the show. I felt bad that she had been nice enough as to wait for me, and I screwed up. And I was pretty bitter coz I had been looking forward to the show all friggin' day. *sigh*

An interesting thing happened at the dive shop I work at; last night when I was working I was talking to a customer for a while when he finally noticed my necklace. It's sort of a 3D Star of David (seen in this pic, on the left) and it's one of the few necklaces I wear without too much worry when out in public (hey, just because I'm a proud Jew, doesn't mean I am always comfortable advertising my religion). The reason I like this one is because anyone who isn't a Jew tends to think it's just a pretty star, but a Jew knows what it is. Anyway, this guy asked me if it was a Star of David I was wearing and for a moment...I actually hesitated in responding. It was weird, and I surprised myself. Maybe it's because lately there has been a rash of anti-semitism in the Toronto area in which 13 Jewish homes had swastikas painted on them, or maybe because recent world events have me a bit unnerved. The man saw me hesitate and he quickly reassured me that he was Jewish too, to put me at ease. For a moment I felt a little embarrassed that I had hesitated like that, but more than anything I was shocked at how worried I was about "outing" myself to a stranger. But after that we had a really nice talk about Israel and how he wants to go visit family he has there, since he's never been. Afterwards I was happy he had come in...he and his wife were a very nice couple to talk to. :-)

And speaking of nice necklaces, I got a really nice one in the mail from Rehovot, Israel. I bought it from a very talented artist on eBay, and I encourage anyone who is interested to check out her work here. Thanks, Jessica! I love the necklace!

What else? Well, perhaps this is a place to talk a bit more about Israel. Heck, I'll even tie it back to Ireland to keep in the spirit of yesterday's St. Patrick's Day celebrations. Despite having only a few hundred Jews in it's midst, Ireland is turning into one of Europe's greatest supporters of Israel. Strange, but true! (hey, I'm not gonna question it...Israel needs all the support it can get). Check out more on it here.

Also, I found a great article on Israpundit today. It touches on the very sensitive issue of media bias when it comes to the Israeli/Palestinian conflict, and does so with some tongue-in-cheek humour. One of the greatest grievances Jews have with the media is how the Palestinians are labelled. It's never as "terrorists", despite the fact that their goal is often to instill terror with their murderous efforts to blow up buses and ports. Instead they are often called "militants" or "activists". The question is....why IS that? How is what they do any different than what the terrorists in Madrid did? (and do you know of any other countries in the world who have had to resort to THIS??) Here are few amusing yet telling looks at the criteria for labelling someone a terrorist, according to this article:

The CNN-BBC-LA Times-Washington Post Handbook for How to be an Activist
From steven plaut

1. Murdering people makes you a killer or a terrorist. But if those murdered are Jews then you are an activist. You might also be a militant.

2. Crashing jet planes into buildings makes you a terrorist. But attempting to shoot down civilian planes landing in Israel makes you an activist.

3. Placing large bombs on trains in Madrid makes you a terrorist, but placing bombs on Israeli buses full of children makes you an activist.

4. Blowing up a nightclub in Indonesia full of Australians makes you a terrorist. But mass murdering Israeli children makes you an activist.

5. Snipers shooting innocent people in Virginia are terrorists. Snipers shooting Jews in the West Bank are activists.

6. People trying to ram soldiers with trucks and cars are generally terrorists unless the soldiers in question are Jews.

For the rest of this article/handbook go here. It's amusing, yet troubling. For actual examples of this problem in the media click here; it outlines the problem, citing real examples from the press, links and all.

Ok, that's enough Israel education for you guys today. As for me, I am taking it easy tonight. I came home from work very early today and spent the afternoon in bed with a migraine. The headache is gone now, but I still feel like I have a headache hangover (or migraine residue, as I sometimes call it).

I'll leave you with one last link, and this one is an amazing one. This is a dog and it's owner doing a dance routine to a song from the movie Grease. I have never seen such a well trained dog in my life (link via Meryl). Enjoy.

Wednesday, March 17, 2004
See? I'm wearing green today (including green eyeshadow!) to mark the day. It's the Irish in me I can't help it. It's true, I'm an Irish girl and I love me potatoes, thank you very much! I've even been known to eat them raw like an apple (much to the utter disgust of my Israeli friend. heh).

When most people ask about my background I say I'm Canadian. Then they say, no really, where were your grandparents from? And I say Canada. Yes, that's right, they don't come much more Canadian than this here white girl. As I so fondly say, first jerks off the boat and exploiting the natives? Yeah, that was my clan. I am like millionth generation Canadian, which ends up making me feel like I have no heritage at all. I know virtually nothing of my Scottish/Irish heritage which leaves me feeling a little....wanting some days. However, that doesn't mean I don't have the drive to go to Ireland..because I most definitely do. It has always been at the top of my list of places to go since I was a child. But when the time came, I chose to go to Israel instead (a choice I by no means regret, and as you all know, I am clamouring to go back).

So I love this day if for no other reason than to acknowledge that little bit of Irish that lies dormant, deep within me. Some Israelis have even told me they hear the occasional word spoken with a slight lilt (accent). What can I say, I at least have the temper that the Irish are known for, and back in the day I could drink anyone under the table. And I don't know who the hell said the Irish were lucky, but I wouldn't exactly say I have been. ha! But I am short, like a wee little leprechaun.

For some history on the occasion try here, the History Channel put together a cool page. If you're looking for a little Irish lovin', try here at PaddyMatch.com (I kid you not!). And here's a site to show you how it's done in Ireland.
Now go put on some green and drink some beer! (see? the Irish know how to have a good time! *wink*)

Tuesday, March 16, 2004
random bits
Well, I'm tired of talking about the trouble in Spain and about how Arafat is a punk-ass who won't even let his police arrest terrorists. Today I just want to talk about light stuff, and walk away from the heavier stuff. Too much drama going on.

First of all, I am very very sad that Gil is walking away from blogging. He was one of the very first blogs I started reading, and has been an inspiration and amazing source of info and insight. I hope he makes his return, one day...

As for myself, I have found my bad mood finally lifting, much to my relief. I was afraid I would slip into the black abyss of depression, but it seems it was a short term mood. Whew. I think part of the relief came when I decided to deal with a problem differently. While I can't forgive (a certain) someone in my life who has caused me great pain (that seemed to have come back to haunt me last week), I *can* turn it around and remember why I loved that person and why the person was my friend to begin with. I chose to focus on the positive and not the negative, and even wrote to the person and said that even though we no longer talk, I will always love him/her. You can love someone but be angry or not even like them. We had a falling out, but that doesn't mean I don't worry or care.
Anyway, so I just wrote a quick note, putting aside my anger and hurt, to say all that. I felt better, and it felt good to let go of the anger for a while. Try it sometime, it's very liberating.

Today I was talking to K-Dogg for quite a while on MSN Messenger. He won't marry, despite me asking several times. I'm trying to not be devastated by the rejection, but he's such a total cutie. Go look at some pics of him. Coz not only is the guy a total babe, but he's funny and smart (we'll let it go that he's American...no one is perfect. :-P). And he has a great blog. If you're not already reading it, go check it out.

*sigh* What else? I see no one wants to make me the happiest woman alive, and send me on a trip to Israel. Last week I could have cried over that because I was going completely mad, but today it just makes me sad. And motivates me to buy a lottery ticket. Come on folks, just a little plane ticket...I'll find my own places to stay while I'm there! (like with Oren, Gil, Rinat, and Civax, for starters)
If you change your mind and want to see me weep with joy (I'll take pics and everything!) you know where to find me. :-)

Last night I came home to a black-as-charcoal dinner; I had left the slowcooker on high instead of low, causing my chicken to look and taste much like leather. I decided to give myself a break, so I had nachos and salsa for dinner (a very bad habit I have long lost...my body thanks me for that), and I watched a terrible movie called "Silent Warnings" (a ripoff of the movie "Signs"). I can only wonder what Billy Zane and Stephen Baldwin were thinking (another straight-to-video gem!).

Tonight I am attempting to recreate the same meal in the slowcooker, but on a lower temperature. Hopefully when I arrive home after work I'll have a meal I can actually eat this time. *fingers crossed* After eating I'm heading over to a friend's house to give her my taxes to do (talk about a true friend! she's too good to me) and to look at old pictures of her ancestors. She's been very busy trying to trace her family's history and she has turned up some interesting stuff. I like to hear about it coz then I get to learn about her culture and history (she's Chinese). All pretty cool. :-)

Two more things.

1. I have rediscovered the band Luscious Jackson (I forgot how much I loved them, and was despondent when they broke up). These girls kick ass, and if you have never heard of them you should. Try the album Natural Ingredients first (the link has sound clips).

2. If you know and/or love the movie The Exorcist you MUST see this hilarious cartoon. It's The Exorcist re-enacted by bunnies, in 30 seconds. I can't stop watching it and laughing (and be sure to check out Amy's Diary while you're there. I laughed so hard my boss came to see what the hell was going on. oops!). Enjoy!

Monday, March 15, 2004
tail between legs
Am I the only one that sees Spain's plan to remove it's troops from Iraq as a victory for terrorism? That's precisely what Al Qaeda wants.... to intimidate. And it worked! Unbelievable...I am truly amazed that Spain would send out such a message. A message that if you attack them, they will back down. This is setting a dangerous precedence for things to come. I mean, I understand their fear, and I haven't generally looked upon this war too favourably...but it's a bit late. They are in the thick of it, and to pull out now sends all the wrong messages. I hate to say it, but unfortunately Al Quaeda won that round.

Meanwhile, the Palestinians are dancing in the streets and handing out candy in celebration of the 'successful' suicide bombings yesterday in Israel. Talk about dancing on someone's grave....it's sick. It must be so hard for the families of the victims to watch people celebrate the death of their loved ones in the news. (information on the victims can be found here)
Israel retaliated mere hours later by destroying buildings/factories used by Palestinians to build rockets and other weapons. No deaths were incurred in their retaliation.

As for me....it's the start of a new week. It's going to be a long 2 weeks ahead of me, actually, as I am entering into a 12 day work week; between the two jobs, I won't be getting a day off until the 27th. That oughtta put me in a fine mood for the next while. LOL. All work and no play makes me a dull girl...

Anybody got some extra cash they feel like spending on a poor Canadian girl to send her to Israel for Pesach (Passover) in a couple of weeks? Think of the joy you'd be spreading!

Are ya sure??

Let me know if you change your mind. *wink*

(and have a good week, folks. oh, and a special hi goes out to a nice Israeli guy who e-mailed me to let me know that he thought my site was great, and to offer some words of encouragement about my Hebrew class dilemma. toda.)

Sunday, March 14, 2004
and the hits just keep on comin'...
10 people killed, 19 wounded in double suicide bombing in Israel.

I am so sick and tired of waking up to news like this.

Saturday, March 13, 2004
the rain in Spain
I have a very similar feeling in the pit of my stomach now as I did in the days following Sept 11th. It's that feeling in which you know things are never going to be the same. As soon as I heard the news about the attacks in Spain I knew the outlook on terrorism was going to change once again. For Spain, THIS is their 9/11. They are finding themselves united against a cause, and are trying to find strength in each other as they struggle to understand why this happened. For the rest of us, it will be a wake up call to realize that this can happen anytime, and anywhere. If it hasn't come knocking on your door yet, it will.
This is what Europe is about to realize. It is happening to them. NOW. And it will, without a doubt, happen again. This is a growing problem and it isn't going away. Mark my words, folks.....this is just the beginning of things to come.

CNN.com has put together an in-depth look at the Spanish attack, including background and all "the players" in the scenario, if you are looking to learn more about it. Keep in mind it's CNN and take everything you read with a grain of salt.

As for me, I didn't post yesterday because I have been unable to shake this funk as I had hoped, and didn't feel you needed to hear me whine about it some more. I learned that just because you declare that you'd like to get off an emotional roller coaster doesn't mean you can. :-/ Sometimes you just gotta wait until the ride is over, I guess....

Thursday night I went over to Princess Blondie's, for our usual Thursday night viewing of Survivor, and she caught on right away that things are a bit off with me. Hardly in the mood to discuss it I tried to play it off like nothing was wrong (keeping in mind that I am the worst liar in the world). So yesterday she e-mailed me and asked what was up. After a few e-mails she was giving me the sweetest pep-talk ever. She's truly one the greatest people to ever have walked into my life, and I am grateful for that.

Anyway, I'm not gonna drone on about my crap mood. It is what it is, and all I can do is hold on and hope that it passes soon. Meantime, I'm gonna go do some much needed laundry over at the parent's place, and go to work for a bit. *sigh*
Hope you all have a nice relaxing weekend.

Thursday, March 11, 2004
the (pity) party is over.
I decided this morning that it was time I stopped being a drama queen. Everyone is allowed a bad day or two, and after two days of being on an emotional rollercoaster I decided it was time to get off. Running away to my cave and hiding wasn't going to solve anything, and after seeing the news this morning about the terrorist attack on a train in Spain I decided there are people out there with worse troubles than mine. It was time to get a grip and see that the sky is not really falling like it seemed. Sometimes I have a habit of allowing myself to get overwhelmed and when that happens I just shut down. I used to have someone I would be able to talk it all through with and let it out, but I am without that close friendship now and I need to start finding my own ways of dealing with things. So. I let myself have a couple of days to freak out, but now it's time to calm down and re-evaluate things. Everything has a solution, sometimes you just gotta take a step back and then look at it again with fresh eyes.
And thanks to all of you who were so sweet and supportive as I had my little meltdown; it's nice to know there are people lookin' out for me. :-) I love you guys!

Anyway, my day yesterday was up and down. My boss took me aside and had the same pep talk with me that he did a few months back (about making my job anything I want it to be and he'd back me 100%). I nearly started crying because I was just NOT in the mood for such a serious conversation. All I wanted to do was crawl under a rock and have the world leave me the hell alone. When he was done he asked me what I thought and I told him that I was in no frame of mind to offer him an intelligent response and that I would have to get back to him.

After that I went back to tackling the computer problems that proved to be the catalyst for my meltdown the day before. Finally, after spending some time with my isp tech support we got the problem resolved. My mood picked up after that as I finally solved the problem, and there's a certain level of satisfaction that comes with that. I knew that I had been stressing about this ridiculous problem the day before, but I didn't know to what extend until it was solved and I felt a wave of relief. So silly that I freaked out about it so much.

Then I got my work schedule for my second job, and found out I don't need to work this week. This also lifted my mood, as I think if ever there was a time I needed a break from school and my second job, it was this week. This also meant that I could take my parents into the scuba shop and go with them for their free trial lesson. It made my mom more comfortable knowing I would be there, and my dad was just plain excited about the whole thing.

When I went home to grab my bathing suit I found a bill in the mail (this good mood wasn't going to last..you knew that right?? lol). It was my income tax bill..... lucky me, I owe $3500. I just put the bill back in the envelope and decided that I wasn't going to stress about it at that point (what good would that do?), and that I was just going to enjoy my evening diving. And so I did. My parents and I had a great time diving and swimming.

My mother called me twice this morning to tell me how excited she and my dad are and about how they want to buy some equipment and take lessons. Apparently they both had the best sleep of their lives (diving can be exhausting, especially to us newbies) and that they feel like a million bucks this morning. And I think my mom and I are both happy we got my dad into a hobby that he's excited about...coz the man is a workaholic and needs to find a way to unwind, bigtime.

As for me and the bigger picture....I need to figure out what made me freak out this week, and do something about it. I think part of it had to do with some unresolved issues with someone; but how do you resolve old disputes with a friend when you are no longer really in contact? I'll either have to write a letter (and not necessarily mail it) to get all my angst out or learn to let it go. I'm not especially thrilled with the idea of writing out how I feel because I'll have to go through all the feelings again in order to get it all down on paper. It didn't feel good the first time I felt it all, and I know it's going to feel just as bad the second time. I don't know if I'm ready for that yet. So for now, I have to find some way to let it go; sometimes you just never get to say what you want to and that's just something one has to deal with. *shrug*

And I need to figure out what I'm going to do about money. I think that's a large part of why I've been freaking out, so it didn't help when I got that enormous bill. I have been considering getting a roommate, but don't know anyone that wants to move right now. Most of my friends either own a home or are still living at home for free and aren't exactly willing to pay to live somewhere else. And living with a stranger holds no appeal to me at all. A roommate would have been ideal because there is a two bedroom apartment opening up in my building and I would only have to move up a floor (and I love this building a lot). It woulda saved me $300 a month too. But alas, the person I wanted to move in with changed his mind and now I am back to square one. I have started going through ads to try and find a cheaper place.....I'll keep looking. I don't know what else to do.

That's about it. I'm feeling a bit better today, so I can start looking at things with a little more clarity. But I'd like to know who the hell called my cellphone at 11:45pm last night. I was sound asleep and by the time I got to my cell I had missed the call. I didn't recognize the number, but it's the same kind of number that comes up when someone calls me from overseas. So of course I freaked out and worried that something was wrong (hey, I was half asleep, and therefore not able to reason things out too well) so I went online to make sure nothing had happened in Israel. All seemed well, and whoever called didn't leave a message. *shrug* I have no idea what that was about.

Anyway, tonight is Survivor night, and provided Princess Blondie isn't out hunting for a new home with her boyfriend Bruno, we'll be doing our usual get-together to watch it. Hope all is well with you guys, and that you're having a better week than me. lol. Can't be to tough to achieve!

(if you need a laugh be sure to check out the dimwitted woman who tried to buy something at Wal-Mart with a million dollar bill! it managed to make me laugh, even in my most foul mood yesterday)

Wednesday, March 10, 2004
and the emotional meltdown continues...
It seems I am retreating into my cave now, and am lacking a desire to be social. Sorry I can't be more entertaining but I'd rather be alone to wallow in my current misery and am one of those people who isn't keen on sharing or talking about it.

I suggest for entertainment you try out some of the links I have in that right hand column (cleverly placed under the "links" title). I didn't compile that list for MY benefit! Go try something new out.

When I'm done with my nervous breakdown, I'll let you know.

UPDATE: I just checked my horoscope. While I never take these things seriously, I still find them fun. And today is one of those days where it actually seems to ring true. That's good, coz if it is...there's a light on outside my cave.

VIRGO: The thrill is gone. For a moment, your dealings with other people seem hollow. Something in the stars sensitizes you to the underpinnings behind every encounter. Then something else happens -- you lighten up. Once you get your head around this realization, your next step will be putting the joy back into your world. Watch others and see how they recharge their batteries. Reconnect with the individuals, places or things that jolt you back to life.

Tuesday, March 09, 2004
miami vice
I'm not going to class tonight and I don't even want to talk about it.
I am in the middle of some kind of meltdown.
Blogging will commence when I am done.

God I wish I still smoked...or drank. I need a new vice.

Monday, March 08, 2004
blogger seeks reader input
Ok, gather 'round, kiddies.....I need some opinions here. I am troubled by a decision I need to make, and I want your input on the matter, k? And weigh it all first and try to see the pros and cons, and not just jump ahead and say I should do it without understanding all sides.

So. Do you remember last week when I was whining and crabbing like a baby coz I was all pissed off about my Hebrew class? Allow me to quote myself for recapping purposes, because I'm too lazy to type it out again: "My teacher has decided that my class (myself and two others, it's tiny) is ready to just move up and join the next level class (that we already sit in on. it's the class right after ours, so we just stay and listen in on their class). This has me a bit upset because the other class is way farther ahead, and I'm simply not ready for it. So this bums me out, and I'm feeling very discouraged. If this is her plan for the next semester (starting in April) then I don't know if I want to sign up again; I'm not paying $200 for a course that I'm completely lost in. It's waste of my time and money and will only discourage me further. But I would be so heartbroken if I didn't have a class....I really want to learn."

Ok, so the point is, I'm still pissed off about it a week later. It has me so grumpy that I don't even want to go to the class tomorrow. I mean, my teacher didn't even bother to mark my homework last time, and I was really feeling dumb in the next level class. Tomorrow is the last class at this level, then there's a two week break, and if I want to go back I have to shell out another 200 clams to join the class again. Do I want to go back even though the class is making me feel dumb and I feel totally lost? Do I want to spend $200 on something that makes me grumpy?

I think the real reason that I'm grumpy is that I absolutely loved my class and the fact that my happy little class is in jeopardy is making me very very unhappy. I want to learn so badly, but if I take a course that's above me it will make me feel dumb and then I get discouraged and I might quit. So do I spend the $200 (that I don't really have) or not?? Will I get over my grumpiness or hate the class from now on?? gahhhhh!!! I just don't know.
All this and my teacher has been super sweet and invited me to her seder (Passover dinner) next month. *sigh*
Anyway, I'm open to your views on the matter, kind readers.

Other than that I had an okay day. Work was ok, nothing too exciting. Though I must say I'm generally less miserable there. I'm not sure if it's because I've had more to do and keeping busy makes me less miserable, or because I have found happiness in the diving, so everything else seems manageable. Hard to tell, but it really doesn't matter. As long as I'm happier.

Tonight as I was unlocking the door to my apartment, my neighbour, Bruno (Princess Blondie's boyfriend) opened his door across the hall and asked me if I'd like to have some dinner. How sweet is that!?! I love my neighbours so much I could just cry. They're too good to me. So after a long day at work I sat down with Bruno, Princess Blondie and Bruno's sister and had some dinner. And afterwards I sat and had tea with them, and then we watched Bruno play Mafia on his Playstation 2. It was a really nice way to finish off my evening. *grin*

So now I'm just chilling and weighing some decisions......what do you guys think?

Sunday, March 07, 2004
I feel I'd be remiss if I didn't mention that it is the Jewish holiday of Purim. It's generally the favourite holiday of Jewish children as it calls for people to dress up and party (much like Halloween for we westerners). The holiday (like nearly all the other holidays) celebrates surviving yet another group of people trying to kill us. lol. This time it was the Jews living in Persia who were almost killed off by Haman. You can get information here on the holiday if you are interested. For a somewhat sobering look at celebrating this fun holiday, go here to Allison's post. She talks about the difficulties of celebrating a happy holiday in a country where heavy security is on every corner to protect the revellers.

Otherwise, I wish all my Jewish readers a Purim Sameach, and to everyone else, a great week!
And for me...I'm gonna go do some more diving!! woohoo!

Saturday, March 06, 2004
beyond the sea
Yup. That's a picture of me diving in the Red Sea last June, when I was in Eilat, Israel. That was the beginning of the end, and now I have gone and taken a second job at a diving shop, and am in the midst of getting my first level of certification. Who knew that a little dip in the sea would lead to all this? Not me, I can tells ya that much!

I am exhausted after a long day on very little sleep. My friend's airplane came in late last night, so I didn't get to bed until 1am, and I was up and at the pool for 8:30am. Actually, that's not entirely accurate, I showed up quite late as I realized *just* before I arrived, that I had forgotten my towel, like a complete dumbass. So I had to turn my car around and head back home. I was running so late by the time I was on my way back that my boss called to see if I remembered I had a class. D'oh! Not a good thing to show up late to a class when (a) you work in the shop and (b) when your boss is letting you take it for free.

Anyway, it was a fantastic day with a really great class. I am in a class with 5 other guys, and we all seem to get along really well. It was tons of fun and we practiced all our skills in the pool and did our best to not drown. Really, it was so much fun, I can't wait for tomorrow.

I'd love to talk more about it, but frankly, I need sleep. I've rewarded myself with pizza and Coke (a rarity since cleaning up my eating habits) and now I want a nice hot bath. After that we'll see if I can stay awake through a movie...then it's bedtime so I am fresh as a daisy (and hopefully punctual) for tomorrow's class. I may not be able to write tomorrow, as I am going right from my class to my parent's place for dinner; my grandma is in town, so the family is gathering. I'll be pretty tired by the time I get there, and even moreso after dinner, so I might post on Monday. We'll see.
Hope everyone is having a great weekend....

oh! And Happy Birthday to one of my bestest friends Melra!

Friday, March 05, 2004
not giving up my day (or night) job
So you know how it is when you plan something out in your head? You know.....you map out how things are gonna go, and what people are gonna say and what you're gonna say in return? And then when things *don't* go as you expect you can get mad or confused or....well. You get the point. And MY point is.....I am not planning on serving papers to anyone again. Ever.

It pretty much didn't go at ALL as I expected. First of all, I had to wait around the switchboard for almost twenty minutes while they tried to find the guy (and my friend was in her car, watching from a distance). The longer I had to wait the more stressed I was getting. When he finally came out I smiled all cute-like and said I had something for him, and tried to HAND the envelope to him.... and I was stunned when he showed resistence. I tried to slip that envelope right in his hand but he wasn't taking the bait. He wanted to know who I was, what was in the envelope and who sent me (basically, he knew what I was up to). Have I mentioned that I am a craptacular liar? Simply the worst, especially under pressure. After fumbling with some terrible lies I turned into a smart ass and asked if he'd like a little song with it to make it a singing telegram. By the end of it all I was just giving him a look and telling him not to make this any harder. Eventually through some means I'm not thrilled about he took the envelope and went on his way. Yikes. Something I thought would take 30 seconds took half an hour. And by the end of it I was all shakey from the adrenaline.

Afterwards my friend and I had a nervous-yet-excited little celebration. It was nice, and I was so happy for her. You could see the relief melt into excitement as she broke into the occasional fit of dancing and singing as she realized it's finally over. It made it alllll worth it, baby! :-)

Later last night I had dinner with Princess Blondie and her boyfriend Bruno (my neighbours across the hall). Then we hung out and then watched Survivor. We had so much fun..... *sigh*. I love those kids.

Tonight I'm chilling out and then picking up a friend from the airport. I already got my bathing suit, and I'm all pumped for the scuba classes tomorrow. Woot woot!! Scuba diving for me!!

Thursday, March 04, 2004
papers and soccer balls
Well, my mood is finally being restored today. I was into work extra early this morning (coz I need to get out early) and I don't have to work or go to a class tonight. I finally have an evening to chill out, and watch Survivor with my neighbours. It has become a ritual every Thursday that I walk across the hall and knock on their door, head in, and curl up on the couch to watch the show together. Nothing like having friends for neighbours. :-)

I'm also in a good mood today because I am helping a friend bring closure to a very painful chapter in her life. Today I am going to walk up to her ex and serve him with divorce papers. I will do my best to keep the large grin off my face, but it will be hard when I know what a sonofabitch he has been to her. A real crime considering this girl truly has a heart of gold (and no, I'm not just saying this because I'm her friend...she really is "one of the good ones").

I have been daydreaming about what I will say to him, and what fake name I will use when introducing myself while suckering him into taking the piece of paper I will be handing to him (what do you think of Sarah Blankenship? lol). It's much more glorified in my head than I'm sure it will end up being, but there have so many movies about this that I run the range of scenarios in my head; everything from him threatening to kill me, to him crumpling to the floor in a pool of tears (wouldn't happen, but if it did I'd have to fight the urge to whip out my digicam to catch his sorry mug finally showing remorse). Maybe I shouldn't be enjoying this so much, but sometimes we have to find the little joys in life.
But most of all, I am glad my friend can move on. She deserves it more than anyone I know, as she has struggled to find herself and her happiness. And if I can help her out, than I damn well will. Sometimes friends are called upon for the strangest favours.... this has definitely been a new one for me. lol. And I am happy and honoured to do it. I'll let you know how it goes.

Meanwhile, a few other things have lifted my mood. The haircut I got last night is making me happy. And today I got my computer nerd/tech guy to call my isp and yell at them for me. I think the connection is better, but I'll have to spend more time on it to really find out. But so far it seems to be much improved! Hurray.

And it's been a while since I've mentioned anything about Israel, so let me bring a story to everyone's attention. In order to keep with the theme of a happy day, I have found an article that shows the efforts in Israel to cultivate peace and tolerance among Arabs and Jews. Recently, 200 Palestinian and Israeli children got together for a bilingual soccer training session. The interesting part was that they didn't just have the sides play against each other, they actually mixed them up and had them play together on mixed teams. Arabs and Jews playing on the same team and working together! They were able to overcome language issues with hand signals, and found that they in fact weren't so different afterall.
This may seem silly to much of the Western world, but every little bit helps in this struggle for peace. You won't ever convince the adults to change their minds when it comes to hate, but there might still be a chance with this younger generation. Here's hoping there's more activities like this in the future...*anything* to foster better relations.

Wednesday, March 03, 2004
returning the seat to the upright position
Well my mood is slowly improving today. I was still a bit grumpy this morning, but I've got an appointment to get a haircut this afternoon, which always makes me happy (plus it gets me out of work a bit early, which also makes me happy). Short hair is bliss, I tells ya (especially if you're taking up diving).

Last night I had an odd dream in which I was locked into this crazy debate with myself over whether or not to buy some wooden bench. It was truly bizarre, because I can't imagine why I would figure I needed one, but I guess that's dreams for ya. I seemed to really be wrestling with the idea of buying it, and I think it all ties back to my dumb debate over buying that necklace. Seems I wanted it even more than I thought. LOL. How exactly that translates to a wooden bench in my mind, I'll never know.

This morning my beloved neighbour across the hall, Princess Blondie, called me up when I got to work. She said, rather excitedly, that the last episode of this season of Survivor was going to be aired on a big screen in Madison Square Garden. I said...."uh...ok. And?" There was a pause. "Are you suggesting that we take a road trip to New York to go see it there??" I laughed. That was a pretty crazy suggestion...and I liked it! What better way to celebrate our Survivor ritual (of watching it every Thursday night together) than with a big party at the end. Gives us an excuse to get out of town. :-) And hey...maybe I'll be able to meet up with a certain NY blogger I know... hurray!!

So that helped to improve my mood. Not sure if it'll happen (I can't afford a necklace, where do I think I'm going to get money for this??) but it's enough to pick up my spirits today. Tonight I have to head over to my second job at the diving shop, so I'm not gonna get home until late again. And at some point I have to buy a damn bathing suit. I'm not one of those girls who loves to shop, so I'm not relishing the thought. I hate trying clothes on, it's a pain in the ass, and it's even *worse* if it's a bathing suit. Not only that, but I'm going to have to make a snap decision because I am extremely limited for time. Stupid bathing suit, fragga shmagga. Why oh why did I have to leave my bathing suit in Israel last year...WHY???

Oh, and one last point. In my attempt to clean up my habits (eating and exercising, that is) this past month, I am happy to report I have finally broken one of my hardest habits. Until now, the only thing more white than my pastey skin colour, was my bread. But now I have graduated to whole wheat bread, ladies and gentlemen. I don't love it yet, but maybe in time. I'm at least not hating it like I used to. lol. And I'm sure not going to go with the 50 grain bread that makes me feel like I'm running through a wheat field with my mouth open. But it's a start. Hell, I've conquered whole wheat bread, I can do anything now! haha

Tuesday, March 02, 2004
my own private pity party
I am in one wicked-assed bad mood. It's really friggin' annoying....I'm not altogether sure what's caused it, though I have my suspicions. First and foremost, I think I'm starting to crack a little trying to fit everything I want to do into my days. Working two jobs and doing my Hebrew class and all that...it's starting to stress me out a bit, I think (my boss caught me doing Hebrew homework at work today, at my desk. not cool). Also, I had a bad class tonight which is a first. My teacher has decided that my class (myself and two others, it's tiny) is ready to just move up and join the next level class (that we already sit in on. it's the class right after ours, so we just stay and listen in on their class). This has me a bit upset because the other class is way farther ahead, and I'm simply not ready for it. So this bums me out, and I'm feeling very discouraged. If this is her plan for the next semester (starting in April) then I don't know if I want to sign up again; I'm not paying $200 for a course that I'm completely lost in. It's waste of my time and money and will only discourage me further. But I would be so heartbroken if I didn't have a class....I really want to learn.
Anyway, I'm sure I'm just being melodramatic because I'm in a mood, but right now that's how I feel. I'm sure I'll get over it by morning, and for sure by next class. *fingers crossed*

On top of that, almost my entire class leapt down my throat over this fucking "The Passion of the Christ" movie. I knew I should have kept my mouth shut about having seen it. I don't even want to talk about it anymore, this movie is so not worth me getting worked up over again. I'm tired of it, and I'm tired of hearing about the movie.

I think I'm just bummed that I haven't won the lottery. LOL! Man oh man, I keep buying tickets, but this plan just hasn't been working out! I can't afford a dumb necklace let alone a trip to Israel. And I'm dyin' inside for both at the moment (I feel like such a drama queen. lol).
*sigh* I want so much to go back and visit Israel..............................

I think I should just shut up now before I wake up in the morning and reread this and want to crawl under a rock with embarrassment over what I've whined about. The people in Iraq have real problems, I just have obstacles and mood swings. No necklace and no trip to Israel does NOT equal the end of the world. I think I'll go have a nice calm bath, relax a little and remember that I have far more to be grateful for than ungrateful.

wants vs. needs
Will someone PLEASE talk me out of buying this necklace??? I want it so bad that it's makin' me crazy. I sit and stare and think about how pretty it would be around my neck. *sigh* Meanwhile I'm considering getting a roommate because my rent is too high and it's putting me in the poorhouse. I *know* I should stop my frivilous spending, but this necklace...it speaks to me...it says.... "buy me! love me!" Hahaha.....
The shipping alone (to Canada), is $18. $18!!! US DOLLARS, which is like a thousand Canadian dollars (or at least it feels like it). That means, (assuming I'm the only bidder) it would be $42.95 US....which is about... $57.64 CAN. Ouch!! See how I can't possibly justify spending that kind of money??? I haven't even got a bathing suit for the diving course this weekend...THAT is what I should be spending my money on!!! *pout*

*sigh* I hate being poor, it sucks ass.
Ok, I'm gonna try and book out of work early and get home to grab a quick bite to eat before Hebrew class tonight. Yay!
Maybe I'll have more to write about tonight..

Monday, March 01, 2004
Ok, I take back what I said about dreading the fact that I had to go to my second job after work today, coz weeeeeee! I had a GREAT shift! My boss has signed me up for my certification course this weekend! For FREE! woot woot, BOOGA BOOGA!!
I am one mighty happy camper right about now. Very very excited. Very.

So of course my brain wants to ruin this happy moment for me by thinking about things too much. You see, I'm already struggling to put in enough study time for my Hebrew class, and I'm just not getting as much homework done as I'd like to. And learning Hebrew is a top priority, so I can't afford to let that slip. It's important to me. However, between two jobs, it's getting mighty difficult to find the time. And NOW I got a lot of diving books I need to read this week before the course this weekend, so when am I going to do my homework for next week's Hebrew class? I usually spend lots of time on the weekend doing it, but with the diving course I will be in class from 8:30am - 6pm Saturday AND Sunday....there's definitely no time for homework then. And I'm working both jobs again on Wednesday! aarrgghhh!!

*sigh* Must not stress myself out. I will make the time for the Hebrew and I will make the time to read the diving textbook. I just won't be too social this week is all. haha...being social is overrated anyway! pfft.
Anyway, just wanted to share my happy news. And weeeeeeeeeee!

making like I'm busy here at my desk
I was in a good mood for most of the day. Then some disagreements with co-workers started to take that all downhill for me...and I am perpetually cursing the ISP here at work, as it works like a dream for about 5 minutes in a row, and then won't load a page for a good 30 - 40 seconds. Then it will work fine again, loading pages lightening fast, and then it won't load jacksquat a few minutes later. It truly makes me angry, and it's why I usually don't post from work like this. It often eats up posts.

And I have found out I'm working tonight at my second job. I was looking forward to going home and doing some homework, but it'll have to wait until after both jobs now. And who are we kidding, I'll be too tired to do homework. That's why I'm posting now...not sure how lively I'll feel by the time I get home tonight. *snore*

Meanwhile I am looking at things on eBay that I would like to buy. I am currently drooling over this item and would give a kidney for it I want it so bad. Ok, maybe not a kidney..maybe my gallbladder, I can do without that. Isn't it pretty???? *sigh* It's also a trillion dollars, or it might as well be. Once you do the dollar exchange, it's a lot of money, and I really shouldn't be spending that kind of money on something that isn't a necessity. *pout*
But isn't it pretty!?!?! Oh how I love it so.

So last night I went to see the movie "Monster" with my friend. The theatre was nearly empty since everyone was off watching the Oscars, so it was nice. Or so I thought. I figured it would be good because there were only 5 pairs of people (my friend and I included) and so we could all have our space and quiet. Amazingly, *every* single idiot felt the need to talk during the movie. ALL of them. And they wouldn't bother to lean into each other and whisper, either. At one point my friend asked the people behind us to be quiet. Then later I told some others to shut up. It just never stopped and I could only wonder what they felt the need to discuss all this time.
At the end of the film I got up and walked over to the couple that had annoyed me most and said: "Next time perhaps you could see fit NOT to talk during the *entire* movie, because it's REALLY friggin' rude!!!". They just stared at me in stunned silence, looking a bit shocked. They said nothing, and I turned on my heel and walked away.

My friend was evidently more pissed off than I, because she tracked down the theatre manager and asked where the hell the ushers were that are supposed to come in and check up on things. Finally the manager just gave us free passes for another movie. Hurray! But grrr! lol Believe me I would have taken a quiet theatre over free passes.

The movie was great, if not disturbing. Charlize Theron did a fantastic job, and managed to both horrify and draw sympathy. She certainly did justice to the real life woman she portrayed. Wonderful performance, but maybe not the film for everyone. There are some violent scenes that can be a little hard to watch (especially for women).

Anyway, if I think of anything interesting to say after work tonight I'll post again. Otherwise, have a good night.