Tuesday, March 02, 2004
my own private pity party
I am in one wicked-assed bad mood. It's really friggin' annoying....I'm not altogether sure what's caused it, though I have my suspicions. First and foremost, I think I'm starting to crack a little trying to fit everything I want to do into my days. Working two jobs and doing my Hebrew class and all that...it's starting to stress me out a bit, I think (my boss caught me doing Hebrew homework at work today, at my desk. not cool). Also, I had a bad class tonight which is a first. My teacher has decided that my class (myself and two others, it's tiny) is ready to just move up and join the next level class (that we already sit in on. it's the class right after ours, so we just stay and listen in on their class). This has me a bit upset because the other class is way farther ahead, and I'm simply not ready for it. So this bums me out, and I'm feeling very discouraged. If this is her plan for the next semester (starting in April) then I don't know if I want to sign up again; I'm not paying $200 for a course that I'm completely lost in. It's waste of my time and money and will only discourage me further. But I would be so heartbroken if I didn't have a class....I really want to learn.
Anyway, I'm sure I'm just being melodramatic because I'm in a mood, but right now that's how I feel. I'm sure I'll get over it by morning, and for sure by next class. *fingers crossed*

On top of that, almost my entire class leapt down my throat over this fucking "The Passion of the Christ" movie. I knew I should have kept my mouth shut about having seen it. I don't even want to talk about it anymore, this movie is so not worth me getting worked up over again. I'm tired of it, and I'm tired of hearing about the movie.

I think I'm just bummed that I haven't won the lottery. LOL! Man oh man, I keep buying tickets, but this plan just hasn't been working out! I can't afford a dumb necklace let alone a trip to Israel. And I'm dyin' inside for both at the moment (I feel like such a drama queen. lol).
*sigh* I want so much to go back and visit Israel..............................

I think I should just shut up now before I wake up in the morning and reread this and want to crawl under a rock with embarrassment over what I've whined about. The people in Iraq have real problems, I just have obstacles and mood swings. No necklace and no trip to Israel does NOT equal the end of the world. I think I'll go have a nice calm bath, relax a little and remember that I have far more to be grateful for than ungrateful.