Monday, March 08, 2004
blogger seeks reader input
Ok, gather 'round, kiddies.....I need some opinions here. I am troubled by a decision I need to make, and I want your input on the matter, k? And weigh it all first and try to see the pros and cons, and not just jump ahead and say I should do it without understanding all sides.

So. Do you remember last week when I was whining and crabbing like a baby coz I was all pissed off about my Hebrew class? Allow me to quote myself for recapping purposes, because I'm too lazy to type it out again: "My teacher has decided that my class (myself and two others, it's tiny) is ready to just move up and join the next level class (that we already sit in on. it's the class right after ours, so we just stay and listen in on their class). This has me a bit upset because the other class is way farther ahead, and I'm simply not ready for it. So this bums me out, and I'm feeling very discouraged. If this is her plan for the next semester (starting in April) then I don't know if I want to sign up again; I'm not paying $200 for a course that I'm completely lost in. It's waste of my time and money and will only discourage me further. But I would be so heartbroken if I didn't have a class....I really want to learn."

Ok, so the point is, I'm still pissed off about it a week later. It has me so grumpy that I don't even want to go to the class tomorrow. I mean, my teacher didn't even bother to mark my homework last time, and I was really feeling dumb in the next level class. Tomorrow is the last class at this level, then there's a two week break, and if I want to go back I have to shell out another 200 clams to join the class again. Do I want to go back even though the class is making me feel dumb and I feel totally lost? Do I want to spend $200 on something that makes me grumpy?

I think the real reason that I'm grumpy is that I absolutely loved my class and the fact that my happy little class is in jeopardy is making me very very unhappy. I want to learn so badly, but if I take a course that's above me it will make me feel dumb and then I get discouraged and I might quit. So do I spend the $200 (that I don't really have) or not?? Will I get over my grumpiness or hate the class from now on?? gahhhhh!!! I just don't know.
All this and my teacher has been super sweet and invited me to her seder (Passover dinner) next month. *sigh*
Anyway, I'm open to your views on the matter, kind readers.

Other than that I had an okay day. Work was ok, nothing too exciting. Though I must say I'm generally less miserable there. I'm not sure if it's because I've had more to do and keeping busy makes me less miserable, or because I have found happiness in the diving, so everything else seems manageable. Hard to tell, but it really doesn't matter. As long as I'm happier.

Tonight as I was unlocking the door to my apartment, my neighbour, Bruno (Princess Blondie's boyfriend) opened his door across the hall and asked me if I'd like to have some dinner. How sweet is that!?! I love my neighbours so much I could just cry. They're too good to me. So after a long day at work I sat down with Bruno, Princess Blondie and Bruno's sister and had some dinner. And afterwards I sat and had tea with them, and then we watched Bruno play Mafia on his Playstation 2. It was a really nice way to finish off my evening. *grin*

So now I'm just chilling and weighing some decisions......what do you guys think?