Friday, April 16, 2004
brain melt
So all the other management is out of the office for the next week or so, leaving me in charge. I don't think you understand what a joke that is. Now, to be fair, we have a tiny office so it's not like I am shouldering a great responsibility. All I'm really in charge of at this point is the phones. We do have staff in the warehouse of our building (as opposed to the office portion that I'm in) but they have someone to watch over them and tell them what to do. I occasionally go back to make sure they aren't 'fucking the dog' but that's about the extent of it. They have their own little leader back there to give them direction and to keep an eye on them. I'm here to open and close the place and to answer phones.

Anyway, I came to work with a splitting headache this morning. I finally relented and choked down some tylenol with codeine since I have plans with friends tonight to see the movie Kill Bill 2 and I don't want to have to bail because I'm not feeling well. So now I pretty much have rid myself of the headache, but an unfortunate side effect of these drugs is drowsiness. At one point I put my head down on my desk here and took a 5 minute nap. Problem was I kept waking up, afraid that someone from the warehouse would find me like this; I suspect the boss might frown upon sleeping on the job. These things don't reflect well on the boss or the sleeper.

Eventually I began making plans to move to the floor under my desk. I figured out how I could create a make-shift pillow and what excuse/lie I could use if I suddenly appeared after someone had been looking for me to no avail. I'm not a good liar, so if I am going to attempt to pull off a lie I have to have it well planned out and rehearsed. So just as I had set up my little pillow and was preparing myself for the nap, someone from the warehouse came into my office. Immediately I was relieved I hadn't already slipped under my desk for the snooze. She asked if wanted a coffee, as she was going up the street to Tim Horton's (practically a religion for Canadians..I mean come on, the coffee place is named after a hockey player! we managed to combine two of our favourite things!). Not being the biggest of coffee drinkers I pondered it for a minute....and then decided to put in my order for a large coffee. If you can't grab sleep, ensure you don't feel the need to, I always say! So now I have a big coffee here on my desk and I'm finally starting to perk up again. Hell, I'm just happy the headache is gone, it was gearing up to be a doozy.

But now I am bored. So I decided to look for something to entertain me. First I went to Playsite and played a game of euchre. However, I lost the game since I had a stupid partner so I gave up after one game. I really have no patience for stupid people. Then I decided to type "bored" into Google and see what site I could find to entertain me. I took great solace in the fact that I was obviously not alone as there are many sites designed to combat boredom. All good stuff, plenty to keep a person busy. Perhaps you'd like to make note of them in case you find yourself in a similar situation.

Then I decided to be like the weirdos who finds MY site by typing strange things into a search engine. First I typed in "chapstick dragon treats" and found this article about worms, on a Wicca site. Not terribly exciting, though perplexing as to why my search would take me there. Then I typed "the other day I saw a guy upside down in the rain" and got some page that a woman had written about rescuing Australian long-necked turtles that insist on crossing a road frequently used by coal trucks. And do you know what I learned after these two lame-ass searches (and a decidedly boring experiment on my part)? That sometimes things are just so crazy that they can't be made up. Real life is often stranger then fiction, and I just can't dream up searches as wacky as those others have come up with when they came to my site.

Here, go check out Dr. Frank's cool picture of a giraffe. It's damn cool, and so strange it could be real. *wink*