I just got a call from my mother; we have a funeral to go to this week. We have lost another member of my already dwindling family. I am sad and have a very heavy heart.....and I am dreading going back home. The only reason I ever go back to my "home town" is for funerals, which unfortunately tends to be a few times a year (my family isn't of the strongest stock it would seem). I get the creeps when I go back there now, and it takes it's toll on me for days.

Mostly I am worried about my grandmother. She is apparently taking it quite badly, and my mother and I have been discussing if one of us should drive up to her (she lives 2 hours north of us). The answer would seem like an obvious yes, but my grandma is a tough old bat, and likes to grieve privately. I'll call her in a bit to check on her and see if she wants me to go up.

Meantime I think I'll go have myself a little cry.
:'-(

(remember my little rant about how it'd be nice to have a best friend to lean on? Yeah, now would be one of those times. :-( Oh well. Props to my friend Melra for trying to cheer me up when she called and found me unhappy. I think we'll just chock this up as one of those things I don't really talk about. sorry bud, sometimes that's just the way I am.)