Friday, March 04, 2005
it's a mad mad mad mad world
Oh the humanity! They are going to take Bubba's poor body and stuff it and put it on display. Poor Bubba. I'm sorry you are being treated like a circus freak. I'm sorry you had just been minding your business at the bottom of the Atlantic when you got scooped up by us dumb humans who made a story out of you only to have you forgotten by next week. Poor Bubba. Rest in peace little buddy.

And what is going on with this world?? First Brad & Jen broke up and now Denise Richards and Charlie Sheen?? And she's pregnant?? Man, he musta done something really bad for her to walk away while she's pregnant. Oddly, this makes me like her more.... I never really liked her in Stormship Troopers and it's just kinda stuck with me. But I like Charlie too, so I'm sad they are divorcing.
Wait! I'm over it. *shrug* Sorry.. I just don't care that much.

This is the first picture that makes me think that the ridiculous "The Gates" art exhibit in New York might actually have some artistic value. I said I might think that.... the jury is still out on the matter.

To the person who found my blog my searching for "how often do most Jewish girls masturbate" I'm going to say this for the last time.... religion really has nothing to do with it. Only how often you will admit to it, at best.

I left work early yesterday because I was getting sick. I am home today sick and it feels like I have been gargling razor blades all night. Throat sore, food BAD. Beverage good. I'm eating chicken soup even as I type this. When I figure out who gave this to me I will hunt the person down and scratch his/her eyes out.

Taken from a post I wrote in November (yes, there's a reason why I am making you read it):
"In the last year or so I have been having dreams about a guy I used to work with and became good friends with. Eventually we had a terrible falling out (I place the blame on us both, not him alone) and we have not spoken to each other since. That must have been.... hm... about 6 or 7 years ago. I had moved on and I'm sure he did the same. Every so often I see his dad at Wal-mart (his dad is a retiree, now happily taking the post as Greeter at Wal-Mart) but the man never seemed to recognize me, much to my relief. Once I even saw my old friend in the Wal-Mart but ducked between aisles to hide from him. It was bad, but I didn't know what else to do. His friendship was a can of worms I was not interested in opening again at that point.

However. As I said, I have had a number of dreams about this guy recently and have started to wonder about him and how he is doing. A lot has changed in my life and I am at a good point, with an overall feeling of being content (with the occasional twinge to move to a foreign country. LOL). When I look back at the falling out I feel a bit guilty about what happened. I know what he did was wrong, but I also know I had been wrong too. And part of me has been re-examining all this and wondering... should I track him down and apologize to him? Would he even want to hear from me or would it be too painful? Would I want to be friends with him again? What would I want out of this? I have been debating this for months. I looked online but the only trace I could find of him was a review of a White Stripes concert he wrote for a website 2 years ago. No e-mail address. :-/

As I stood in line last week for The Pixies concert last week I noticed something. The guy ahead of me... his walk was familiar. I KNOW that walk, I thought. Could it be? Could I actually be standing right behind him?? It was pouring rain at the time, and most of us had pulled a hood over our heads, and were keeping our heads down. It was dark, it was wet and it was miserable. I hurried my pace a bit as the line moved to try and get a look at this guy from the side (he was wearing a hat... the back view wasn't giving me any answers). Just as I got a glance and a confirmation it was him he turned around. Not knowing what to do I quickly (and obviously) turned around too, only now I ended up facing the person he had turned to talk to, who had walked up behind me. It was a mutual friend of ours that I hadn't seen since the falling out. I was stuck in an awkward ex-friend sandwich. Luckily, neither of them paid any attention and didn't notice/recognize me (it helps that I look a great deal different than I did back then). Part of me really wanted to grab his sleeve and reveal myself to him, but part of me felt like the timing, in the pouring rain and all, was poor. And on top of that, I was meeting other friends (the guy from the story prior) who most certainly would NOT have wanted to spend the rest of the concert hanging out and catching up. So I let the moment pass.

Of course I dreamt again about him that night and now I am left wondering... should I or shouldn't I try and contact him? I combed the internet once more, but couldn't find him. I found his parents phone number, and he is likely living with them..... but is a phone call the best way? I would rather put out feelers with an e-mail. I don't want to put the guy on the spot by just calling him up, coz I know that I might not appreciate that if someone did that to me. Is it really my place to shake his world up again? I know I have a few friends from my past that I don't ever want to hear from again, so I'd be pissed if they contacted me. Then again... I am coming with an apology, which would change everything for me if I were in that position."

Yesterday I saw this guy's dad again in Walmart. I gave my card with my e-mail to his dad. My friend wrote me last night, I called him about an hour ago. I am leaving in five minutes to go see and talk to him again. He was extremely welcoming to the idea of becoming friends again. He didn't kill me like I thought he'd want to! I am very happy and excited to be going to see him. Hopefully I won't give him my cooties. This soup had better be as good as they say it is for curing colds.

Shabat Shalom.